Thursday, April 1, 2010

Rule #3: Bottoms Up!

I could also have entitled this, "My hands are just too big."  This post is a critique of the book's third chapter which provides a comical view of diaper duty and potty training.  According to the author, you can't "train an elephant to rollerskate" and its just as silly to think you can train a man to change a baby's diaper.

I beg to differ.  My husband changes diapers and he is very good at it.  He hates it, complains bitterly, gags, and sometimes gets poop on his fingers, but he changes them.  However, I think he still may be an exception to the rule.  I know several men who have never changed a diaper and never intend to. Their "babys' mommas" grumblingly accept this, but allow the behavior to persist.  This would not work in our family or in my marriage.  We go halfers all the way.  What few couples realize is that having a baby is a lot like adopting a pet.  A couple must come to a firm and clear agreement well in advance of any living addition to a household on who will be responsible for changing the diapers (or cleaning out the litter box, walking the dog, etc.).  In my opinion, if you helped make the baby then half the poop belongs to you, so man up and dive in. 

Speaking of diaper duty, I have a funny story from a couple of evenings ago.  Aunt Sha Sha was visiting and the baby pooped her diaper. While I changed the baby, Aunt Sha Sha held her doll during which time she thought it would be funny to smear the doll's bottom with peanut butter and then insert a Tootsie Roll into her little diaper.  When I finished changing Maddie, Sha Sha told her that she believed that her baby needed a changing too.  Maddie was alarmed at the diaper's contents and recoiled in disgust.  She fretted and carried on about the baby doll's poop for almost ten minutes before losing interest, much to our amusement.  When I laid the baby down that night, she looked at me and said, "Sha Sha pooped in baby's diaper."  This explained her surprise.

P.S. Don also cleans the litter box.  I am allergic to cat dander.

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